Why Mornings Are So Hard (and How to Make Them Better)
Why Are Mornings With Kids So Hard?
If your morning involves a daily battle over getting dressed, choosing shoes, or leaving the house, you're not alone. For many parents, the hours between wake-up and get-out-the-door are the most stressful of the day. You might be wondering if you have a "difficult child" or what you're doing wrong, but the truth is, this struggle is a normal part of child development.
The key to transforming difficult mornings with your kids isn't about more discipline; it's about understanding their developing brains. Here are five simple, evidence-backed strategies to end the morning battles and create a calm morning routine for your family.
1. Create Rock-Solid Predictability
A young child's brain is still developing the skills needed for planning and focus. A sequence of tasks like "get dressed, eat, then brush teeth" can feel overwhelming.
The Fix: A consistent toddler morning routine is essential. Do the same things in the same order every single day. The best tool for this is a visual schedule for kids. A simple chart with pictures makes the routine concrete, reduces their anxiety, and empowers them to know what's next without you having to nag.
2. Fill Their Connection Cup First
Before you can expect cooperation, your child needs to feel connected to you. Morning resistance is often a subconscious plea for connection before they have to leave you for the day.
The Fix: Start the day with a five-minute snuggle. No agenda, no talk of the schedule—just warmth and closeness. This one small act fills their "attachment cup" and makes them far more secure and ready to cooperate.
3. Sidestep Power Struggles with Choices
The constant "No!" isn't defiance, it's your child's core mission to develop a sense of independence. Power struggles with toddlers erupt when this fundamental drive is blocked.
The Fix: Offer two acceptable choices. "Red jumper or blue jumper?" "Shoes on before your coat or after?" This simple technique gives them the control they crave while ensuring the necessary tasks get done, preventing many tantrums in the morning.
Ready to Make Over Your Mornings?
Knowing the strategies is one thing, but putting them into action when you're tired and rushed is another. To make it easy, I’ve created a FREE Morning Rescue Kit just for you.
It includes a printable routine chart, sanity-saving scripts for what to say during a meltdown, and simple connection ideas to start your day with a smile, not a shout.
Ever Felt Like You’re Juggling Water?
Do you ever feel like you're just reacting to life instead of living it?
You're not alone. Many parents, carers, educators, and leaders are tired of feeling like they're on the back foot, constantly battling chaos and stress.
It's a common tale, where the demands of home and work crash together, leaving you feeling like you're constantly on the back foot, just reacting.
What you really want is a different way to genuinely connect with your child, your students, or your team. This is where The HRologist comes in, giving you a toolkit to find your own powerful answers.
Our approach goes even further than traditional training, boosting your satisfaction and confidence, and making lasting change a reality
The Backpack, The Biscuit, and The Big Feelings
The back-to-school frenzy is a challenge for parents and kids. It's a time of change, new routines, and heightened emotions. But what if this period could be an opportunity for growth instead of stress? Our approach at The HRologist focuses on helping people, families, and organisations handle big feelings and build stronger relationships.
This transition isn't just about new uniforms and supplies. It's about teaching essential social and emotional skills. By helping your child set up a simple planner, you're not just getting them organised; you're building executive function skills like planning and self-management. This is a low-stakes way to practice real-world skills and nurture relationships along the way.
When you sit down to talk with your children about their hopes and fears, you are creating a safe space to share. This simple act can reduce anxiety. By helping them name their emotions—a process known as affect labeling—you're turning an overwhelming feeling into a manageable problem. This is a cornerstone of our work.
Why This Matters for Everyone
This same psychology applies to the workplace. The principles of open communication, nurturing relationships, and creating safe spaces are fundamental to building a healthy, high-performing team. Whether you're a parent managing the morning rush or an HR professional helping a team navigate change, understanding these emotional and psychological needs is key.
Our unique blend of psychology, coaching, and trauma-informed care offers practical solutions for the human relationship problems that show up everywhere, from the family dinner table to the boardroom. We believe that when people grow, everything changes.
The Going Back-to-School Jolt: What’s Really Going On
Happy Champs Circle offers calm support and practical tools for parents. Join a supportive community to build trust, model emotional regulation, and stop second-guessing yourself. Get access to monthly topics, toolkits, and private audio coaching.